Went to a UK university talk today, got some info over a few universities that I had my eyes on. And of course, my score isn't enough. Some of them require straight As while others only accept slightly less. My score is obviously isn't there and I knew it even before I went there. That means retaking A Levels which will probably occupy my next year's schedule. No surprise there.

Had a chat with Kok Hon over the life my parents want me to live and the one that I want to live. It is true that all these "top university", "studying in UK" and "be someone" are what my parents wanted and not what I want. All I really wish for is a more gradual and calm life. No rushing about, no hurry. Study undergrad in Australia, try hitting a top university again during my postgrad. Learn more about photography instead of facing the stress of exams. And et cetera. Yet to make them happy, I must do certain things according to their wishes.

Sometimes it's hard to decide who to follow. When I'm afraid to lose someone, I will probably follow that person. Yet there are other things around me that pulls me away from that direction. Personal ambition, parents' expectations. Slowly I came to believe that what is mine will always be mine, be it friends or lovers or things or positions or whatever. I came to believe that God will lead me to the right way (and indeed He has till now). I believe whatever I obtained are rightfully mine while whatever I failed to get aren't. It doesn't mean I don't try to do my best to get the things I want. It only means I don't feel bad not getting it.

Anyway, next year's plan: Retake A Level and learn sketching. And both must be done pretty well...

Well nothing's worth trying unless it's hard.

Currently doing something so I will halt the update of photos for a while. And then a major update!